Yes, you. That’s right, I’m talking to you. Who do you think you are? A magician? Yes, you who hide behind your computer and tell people what to do with their lives and how to do it. On top of that, you give them the guarantee it will work. Enough.
We live in an era where we read more online articles (5 to 10 min read) then proper books. I haven’t done any research to back it up. It’s just a hunch because, in our century, writing and posting are as easy as changing socks every morning. And that’s great because expressing ourselves became much easier. But there is a setback with those recurrent articles:
14 days to transform your life
The 3 keys to becoming irresistible
Want to live a life 99% of other people will envy?
5 actionable steps to immediately become a better writer
Wake up at 5am and you’ll be successful
Quit your 9am to 5pm job right now.
Get out of your comfort zone
Follow your passion
Start your business
And so on…
I haven’t made any of these up. They are all part of my Medium Daily Digest. And it’s wrong.
Because they make it seem so easy
Why? Because they make it seem so easy. Yes, they do. As if there is a process to follow to become the best version of yourself. Tips and advice are always welcome. But a process to follow, really? Have you heard of the uniqueness of each human being? It doesn’t mean if it works for them, it will work for you. We all have different stories, experiences, lifestyles, and definition of happiness. The worst is how determined those bloggers are to get the most views from their readers. But, this forced influence is wrong. Bloggers forget they have no right to dictate others people life. To share how they did it their way, sure. But injunctions are harmful.
One could argue who am I to criticize and have my say on this topic. Fair enough. I’m not a blogger and might never be one. The only legitimacy I have is changing my job, following my passion and starting a company. I already wrote about it in here Fuck the system. And when I read those articles it seems like paradise and freedom are awaiting you on the other side. Wrong again.
Because it’s gonna be harder than you imagine
Why? Because this journey is gonna be much harder than you could ever imagine. On the paper, it seems like an easy move. Let’s take my example of a new 4-month job opportunity in Budapest. To move there for 4 months is obvious and shouldn’t be a big deal, especially if the opportunity ticks all the boxes. But you put yourself in an unstable situation and you have no idea what to expect from the job or the near future. This was in March 2015. Today, in April 2018 I still work for the same company in Budapest. I intended to keep this job because I learned a lot. Most importantly, for the first time in my life, I felt I love my job. But still, I have struggled personally and professionally for the last 3 years. And I still remember most of my friends in Paris (where I have lived for 6 years) telling me how courageous I was to do this. And I never understood why. Until it hit me. Yes, it hit me like a ton of bricks last year. How I have left behind everything I have built in Paris to the unknown in Budapest. Then I think of other friends of mine who could have moved to other countries but did not. This is when I start wondering and questioning our society. A society that preaches mobilization all over the world, to an extent where almost everyone is a digital nomad. But it turns out moving in the 21st century is easy only for a few of us.
And because of this, I had a breakdown
I changed my life. I changed my career. I changed city. And because of this, I had a breakdown last year. Luckily, my friends and family were here for me. Because without them, I wouldn’t even have written this blog post. We are all born to survive and I truly believe it. But those bloggers or writers who absolutely want to influence others, don’t realize the risk they are taking by pushing someone to change his life. Have they ever thought it could turn out to be terrible? So bad, the person they have influenced is bankrupt now, or close to depression? They are not aware of the responsibility they take when writing down stuff that worked for them but doesn’t work for everyone. And those who do realize but don’t say anything are selfish assholes. That’s why I respect Gary V. Gary is definitely an influencer who wants the youth to do and give more of themselves. He’s always harsh and honest in his public declarations. The reason I respect him is that he says the following:
I want those kids or adults to know if it doesn’t work I’m the one to blame.
It could mean shit to the person himself, but at least Gary has the courage to stand up and say it to the world. Not like the average bloggers who hide behind their computers and promise you a better life.
Whatever you decide, remember that you are born to survive and at the end, it’s gonna be alright. But, if you don’t want to do it and don’t want to change your life, then don’t do it. No one is forcing you. I will respect you for having the courage to say no.